The faults of others can do us good

UNTIL God ordains otherwise, a man ought to bear patiently whatever he cannot correct in himself and in others. Consider it better thus -- perhaps to try your patience and to test you, for without such patience and trial your merits are of little account. Nevertheless, under such difficulties you should pray that God will consent to help you bear them calmly.

If, after being admonished once or twice, a person does not amend, do not argue with him but commit the whole matter to God that His will and honor may be furthered in all His servants, for God knows well how to turn evil to good. Try to bear patiently with the defects and infirmities of others, whatever they may be, because you also have many a fault which others must endure.

If you cannot make yourself what you would wish to be, how can you bend others to your will? We want them to be perfect, yet we do not correct our own faults. We wish them to be severely corrected, yet we will not correct ourselves. Their great liberty displeases us, yet we would not be denied what we ask. We would have them bound by laws, yet we will allow ourselves to be restrained in nothing. Hence, it is clear how seldom we think of others as we do of ourselves.

If all were perfect, what should we have to suffer from others for God's sake? But God has so ordained, that we may learn to bear with one another's burdens, for there is no man without fault, no man without burden, no man sufficient to himself nor wise enough. Hence we must support one another, console one another, mutually help, counsel, and advise, for the measure of every man's virtue is best revealed in time of adversity -- adversity that does not weaken a man but rather shows what he is.

--Thomas à Kempis, The Imitation of Christ, chapter 16

Get used to thinking of things and persons, always and in all things, in the best possible light. If a deed has a hundred aspects, said the blessed Bishop of Geneva, always look at it from the best side. (…) I have naturally the vexing habit of judging everything and everyone by my own wretched self, but experience has taught me what a joy it is to approach things differently and how God blesses this way of behaving. [p. 92]

(St Vincent de Paul. From Jacques Delarue, The Holiness of Vincent de Paul, Geoffrey Chapman Ltd, London 1960, 132 pp)